reasons I can relate to a possum:
-tired & unkempt, smells weird
-emotions ranging from “displeased” to “existential scream”
-no work ethic
-lies around looking dead when overwhelmed
-will eat trash & live amongst trash if left to own devices
-sometimes you feel bad and feed it a sandwich
John can't like Sherlock! He's married to a woman!
I dunno, maybe he's straight, but the only man he's attracted to is Sherlock.
*There is a great and powerful rumbling. A herd of people crests over the horizon.*
Leader of the Group:
*steps forth* Hello. We're the Bisexuals, and we'd like to have a word.